Parents & Family

Article How do I help parents build their athlete's confidence instead of hurting it? Every adult is a confidence builder or a confidence cutter. Teach parents to encourage, model poise, give honest praise, and release their athlete. Read now Article How do I coach my own child without ruining it for both of us? Separate the roles: be "coach" at practice and "Dad" or "Mom" the moment it ends. Bruce Brown's guidance for coaching your own child without regret. Read now Article What do I say to parents whose kid is losing the love of the sport? Kids lose their love of sport for five reasons: constant losing, negative coaching, burnout, over-complexity, and outside pressure. Help parents find which one. Read now Article What do I do when a parent goes over my head to the athletic director? Go to the AD yourself before contacting the parent: bring documentation, ask their counsel, and never meet an upset parent alone — Bruce Brown's approach. Read now Article What should I tell parents their role is on our team? Parents' role: release their athlete to the game, coach, and team; model poise during games; give time and space after. Encouragers, not coaches. Read now Article What do I do about an over-involved parent who is stressing out their kid? Meet the parent privately and restore one instructional voice — the coach's. Bruce Brown: stressed parents produce stressed-out, poor-performing athletes. Read now Article How do I get parents to release their athlete to the program? Teach release at the pre-season parent meeting: hand parents their athlete's goals, ask what a successful season looks like, and let the kid's answers lead. Read now Article What should parents say on the car ride home after a game? Say "I love watching you play," then give your athlete time and space. Bruce Brown found the car ride home is the worst memory of many athletes' careers. Read now Article What do I do about parents yelling from the sidelines at games? Teach parents the four roles — coach, athlete, spectator, official — and the one-instructional-voice rule, then correct sideline coaching the first time. Read now Article How do I respond to an angry email from a parent? Don't argue by email. Reply briefly, move the conversation to an in-person meeting with an administrator present, and keep the email as documentation. Read now Article What should I cover in my preseason parent meeting? Cover your philosophy, schedules, rules, team standards, volunteer roles, and team covenants — and hand each parent their athlete's written goals. Read now Article How do I handle a parent who's angry about their kid's playing time? Meet in private, never right after a game. Listen before you respond. Bruce Brown's approach to angry-parent conversations about playing time. Read now Video Parents, Releasing Your Athlete Part of the Role of Parents in Athletics series — on the single practice his most successful athletes credited for getting them where they got: parents… Watch now Video Parents During the Game Continuing the Role of Parents in Athletics series — what athletes say helps them during competition itself, the part of the experience kids love most… Watch now Video Parents Before the Game The first of four or five 10-minute topics drawn from one of Proactive's most requested presentations of the past two decades, The Role of Parents in… Watch now Video Parents After the Game Finishing his series on the role of parents in athletics — covering parents' responsibilities to their athletes after the game. Topics covered: the exit… Watch now Video New Additions from the Original Presentation On the role of parents in athletics (speaker not named in the recording; context — age 48, a daughter in trap shooting — indicates Rob Miller rather than… Watch now Video I Love Watching You Play Sharing the origin of the now-famous phrase from his Role of Parents in Athletics presentation — Proactive's most requested presentation nationwide, built… Watch now Video Preparing for a Parent Meeting On the pre-season parent meeting — one of only a couple of official parent meetings a coach gets (the other being the end-of-year banquet), and a one-shot… Watch now Video Dad's Home On the advice he received in his forties that he wishes he'd had in his twenties: how to transition from coach to family each night. Topics covered: the… Watch now Video 4 Roles Drawn from The Role of Parents in Athletics — one of Proactive's most-requested presentations, with companion DVD and booklet built almost entirely from… Watch now Podcast Pick One, Play Them All Rob Miller on the myths and realities of early specialization: 88% of college athletes played multiple sports, overuse injuries are up 70%, and the scholarship math almost nobody checks. Listen now Podcast When Cheering Becomes Harassment Rob Miller on the exact line fans cross — from yelling, to using a kid’s name, to something personal — and the officials crisis that follows when nobody names it. Listen now Booklet The Role of Parents This booklet by Bruce E. Brown examines the role of parents in their children's athletic experience from the perspective of the athlete, drawing on three… Read now Article Seven Tips for a Successful Year in Sports Seven Things You Can Do to Help Your Athlete Have a Successful Educational Experience in Athletics This School Year Read now Article Partnering With Officials Athletes And Parents This article from Proactive Coaching, written by Mike Morgan of Proactive Coaching LLC, discusses the vital role officials play as "Guardians of the… Read now Article Parents Role In Athletics 2 This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching, excerpted from the booklet and DVD "The Parent's Role in Athletics," examines the parent's role in… Read now Article Parents Role In Athletics This article by Bruce E. Brown, from the Proactive Coaching "Parents and Coaches Working Together" collection, is the first in a series on the parent's… Read now Article Parent's Role Additions Asking permission before you give advice — how parents earn the right to be heard by their grown athlete. Read now Article Over Involved Stressed Parent This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching LLC, from the Parents and Coaches Working Together collection, illustrates how over involved,… Read now Article Father's Day Message This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching, titled "A Father's Promise," presents a Father's Day message on parenting an athlete. It shares… Read now Article Do Competitive Sports Competitive Parents This article from Proactive Coaching, from the Parents and Coaches Working Together collection, examines how youth sports have become more intense and… Read now Article Black Belt Mom This article from Proactive Coaching, written by guest contributor Teri Helms and included in the Parents and Coaches Working Together collection, offers… Read now Article Be The Parent Who Is Part Of Their Good Athletic Memories This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching, from the Parents and Coaches Working Together collection, gives sports parents practical guidance on… Read now Article Are You A Pushover This article from Proactive Coaching, written by Tim Driver, addresses parents who may be pushovers with their children. Drawing on more than 20 years of… Read now Article A Senior Athlete This article from Proactive Coaching, shared by Bruce E. Brown and written by Times reader Frank Workman, imagines a letter a senior high-school athlete… Read now Article A Parent's Wish This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching, from the "Parents and Coaches Working Together" collection, is a letter written in the voice of… Read now Article 5 Things Athletes Would Like Their Parents To Know And Do This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching LLC, from the Parents and Coaches Working Together collection, is drawn from the presentation "The… Read now Article 21 Rules Of This House This article from Proactive Coaching, written by guest author Gregg Harris, presents a list of 21 household rules for families. The rules cover obedience,… Read now Article The Multi Sport Athlete This article from Proactive Coaching, written by guest writer Stephanie Hauser, Athletic Director at Stevens Point Area High School in Wisconsin, examines… Read now Article Protecting Yourself From Problem Parents Coaches - Protecting Yourself From Problem Parents Read now Article Preparing for a Tough Conversation with an Angry Parent Preparing for an Angry Parent Read now Article Planning For A Parent Meeting This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching, an excerpt from the booklet Youth Coaching, 4 Keys to a Successful Season, explains how coaches… Read now Article One Small Change This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching encourages coaches and Athletic Directors, whose schedules often take them away from their own… Read now Article Missing Dad This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching, written shortly after the death of his 96-year-old father, reflects on the blessing of a lifelong… Read now Article 4 Kinds Of Cheering This article by Bruce E. Brown of Proactive Coaching describes the four kinds of cheering he has observed as a spectator at high school sporting events:… Read now Article 28 Success Rate This article by Bruce E. Brown and Mike Morgan of Proactive Coaching LLC, an excerpt from the booklet Youth Coaching, Four Keys to Successful Season,… Read now